A Hand in C Major (2022)
Performance, 20 min.
Boundaries set us free. No is a healing word.
When my clear, well-articulated and deeply embodied noes weren’t heard, the bitterness that came out of it manifested itself on my hands as clenched fists. My body lost equilibrium in tension & release; making me feel stuck in rigidity with sizzling hands. I heard it in my breath too; my typical breath in C Major, in tune with my curiosity, my openness, my easy reach to love, compassion and connection changed key and started sounding D Minor to me: resentful, angry, cold, detached from safety and belonging.
A child of the element earth, when I am transgressed, I harden. Finding back softness, the C Major, the open/flowing/receiving/giving hand is further complicated with nuances of the kind of culture we wish to create. With our bodies and their entanglements, with our practices of accountability, with loving our and others’ boundaries and noes, with the sacred work of building trust. Nervous system care, dance and movement, support of loves, newly emerging possibilities of interdependence, the alchemy of grief, the sun, the element water and other kin carried me to a more healed state.
A state in which, feeling safe within my boundaries, I could leave the light on for reconciliation, love and many futures that can take place.
